It's all about Trust and Respect!

It’s amazing how much influence you can have by not trying to influence anyone. I know it sounds a little strange, but it was called to my attention last night and again this morning as I talked with my lovely wife Peggy.

We made a decision long before we were married that we were going to be married forever. Both of us had marriages that did not last and neither of us wanted to ever have that happen again. We figured the best way to keep it from happening would be to make a proclamation prior to getting married and abiding by the proclamation as we went down the path of marriage.

It’s interesting the effect that type of decision has going forward (in fact there is another article I’ve written on the subject of decision making in the “Articles” section of this website called “Everything In Life Begins With A Decision”). Being committed to the first decision keeps you from doing some of the things that we find many people doing in their relationships that ultimately do damage on a consistent basis.

While much of that is covered in the other article, I really want to touch on two points that became very transparent to me. They are Trust and Respect.

By definition, trust is the reliance on and confidence in the truth, worth, reliability of a person or thing. In this case, it is very clearly being able to rely on your spouse or significant other. It is a “knowingness” that your partner has your back. And that above all other, they are there for you…as you are for them in return.

Doesn’t this hold true in many a business relationship also? At least it should. Relationships are relationships when done right. It really doesn’t matter whether they are personal, professional or even spiritual, to have a truly fulfilling relationship there must be trust involved.

Funny thing that trust, it is not easily given but very easily lost. Trust is earned over time through consistency of word and deed. Probably the most important word there is consistency. By the very nature of trust having to be earned, it is far more delicate in the early stages. That is not to say that it is not as delicate later on. It is something that has to be nurtured…consistently.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.—that is what it means to me, from the great Aretha Franklin song shouts out loud and clear. Respect is an attitude of deference, admiration, or esteem exchanged between individuals. That sounds pretty solid to me! I love the fact that Peggy is my biggest supporter, cheerleader and advocate of mine…and I am of her. That’s why we hold each other in such high regard.

In order to gain respect, you have to give respect. And in order to be trusted you in turn have to trust. By simply living this way in front of our friends, at least one couple is now getting along better and working at consistently moving forward in their relationship because they have seen what it has done for our relationship. It’s an honor to be of service especially when it can bring so much good.

These two foundational principles can and will make a huge difference in the quality of your relationships. I encourage you to take a look at what’s going on in your world and evaluate the level of commitment you have been giving. You have the power to choose to grow these two foundation attributes.